Take My Hand

Today as I was getting ready to clean our bathrooms, I was searching for a playlist to get me into "toilet scrubbing" mode.  Ok, really I was looking for something uplifting and praiseworthy as I began this not so fun, but oh so necessary task.  I did a quick search for "New Praise 2012" or something like that and came up with what looked to be a promising playlist on Spotify.  Little did I know how blessed I would be by one little song in this queue.  I love God's surprises of love at unexpected times.

I was almost done with both bathrooms; as I was mopping the floors I heard one stanza from a song with pretty music... "I'm not asking for... safety..." was all I could make out (since I was sort of just half listening, half in dream land).  I quickly made my way to the computer and hit rewind.  Here is the beautiful song that was playing:



Its called "Take My Hand" by Linsay McCaul.  Here are the lyrics:

Take My Hand -Lindsay McCaul & Jason Ingram

I heard You say it, I know You did

You called me out into the waves and wind

And for a moment I was brave and strong

But now everything is going wrong



Didn’t You know that I’d be scared 

Couldn’t You see I was unprepared

I’m not asking for reasons You hold or the safety of land

I just need You to take my hand



I could have stayed back where I was before

And never met You in this raging storm

You’re telling me that faith is all I need

But fear is all that I can find in me



Didn’t You know that I’d be scared 

Couldn’t You see I was unprepared

I’m not asking for reasons You hold or the safety of land

I just need You to take my hand





Cuz I would be ok if You’d take my hand

I wouldn’t be afraid if You’d take my hand

All would fade away if You’d take my hand

If You’d take my hand….



Didn’t You know that I’d be scared 

Couldn’t You see I was unprepared

I’m not asking for reasons You hold or the safety of land

I just need You to take...

Won’t You please come and take…

I just need You to take my hand

_____________________

I don't know the history of this song, but if it wasn't written specifically for a baby-loss mom, God sure used it to minister straight to my aching mommy heart anyways!  As soon as I heard the line "Didn't you know I'd be scared, couldn't you see I was unprepared/ I'm not asking for reasons you hold/or the safety of land, I just need you to take my hand" my mind was transported back several years to when I was carrying Whitney.  So scared.  So unprepared.  Feeling so inadequate but through it all, feeling immensely called.  Called to carry this fragile, tiny life.  To bring light to the gift that is LIFE in all situations.  I wasn't asking for reasons why she was sick.  I didn't ask "why us"?  Our constant prayer was for God's guidance.  To take my hand.

And he did.  Every step of the way.  I think of Peter with Jesus when he stepped out of the boat to walk on water.  To the other discipled in the boat, as Peter began to go under, it must have looked like he failed.  But Peter learned a valuable lesson that day.  Even in the midst of the storm, scary winds, uncertain outcomes Jesus will always be there.  Reaching out his hand.

So many times we ask for an explanation.  We ask for God to take away the pain immediately.  We ask for a quick way out, a teleport to safety.  But that's rarely how it works.  Pain is a part of life because we are fallen people.  But God is great even in the midst of our pain.  Often, we have to walk through it to get the full blessing that lies for us at the end.  God doesn't owe us an explanation for why things happen.  Sometimes there is no other reason than one word: sin.  But the glorious part of this whole entire life we are living is that sin and death are not the end.  God wins.  Every time and ultimately in the End.  God wins.  He conquered death when he sent his son, Jesus to die on the cross.  But he didn't stay dead.  He rose from the grave, and in doing so overcame sin and separation from God!  This is Good News people!  So when we look for explanations and immediate rescue, the safety of land, if you will- that's not always how it happens.  Of course I fully believe with all my heart that God can and does heal people, even still today.  But lately I have been trying to change my prayers a bit.  They are no long "God take this away. Amen."  There's something more like, "God, I know you can heal (me, this situation, this person, etc).  I believe in your power and your goodness.  But if you choose not to do that right now, show me how I can bring glory to your name through the journey."

I know this is applicable to so many different circumstances.  Really, any trial we may face.  God is right there with us.  He knows our hearts, the fear that creeps in.  But what he wants us to know and to take advantage of is that he is always there, reaching out his hand.  We just have to take it.  I hope that sharing this blesses someone else today the way it has ministered to me.  Such a beautiful song!